Reds’ King on the Bench, Van Dijk the Hero…
Our beloved Egyptian pharaoh, Mohamed Salah, found himself benched in a moment that could only be likened to putting a lion in a playpen. While Salah was busy tuning his goal-scoring guitar on the sidelines, it was Virgil van Dijk, the Dutch skyscraper in cleats, who hit the winning note against West Ham. Forget the six-point safety net closer to the title, Van Dijk just climbed the Anfield Asgard and planted Liverpool’s victory flag at the peak!
As Wataru Endo mushed onto the field like a racing reindeer with an 85-minute sleigh ride, Salah took his seat looking like a kid who’d lost his last golden ticket to Willie Wonka’s sweetest party. Striding off the pitch with a fist bump to Arne Slot and the face of a thousand stories, his internal scoreboard flashed: ‘Penalty Goals Last Two Months: Check, Goals from Open Play: Nil.’ The Kop’s exuberant cheers finally melted the Grinch inside him, as he applauded the symphony of his namesake song.
In a plot twist worthy of the best football soap opera, van Dijk played hero and villain—assisting West Ham’s own goal, only to redeem himself with a thunderous header. Sporting his joy like a new kit, he didn’t just kiss the badge; he practically proposed to it. Meanwhile, Salah dreams of record-breaking feats, spurning Saudi offers with a decisive ‘Pass’ and clutching his Liverpool allegiance tighter than an octopus hug. With contracts cooking in the Reds’ pot, both lads seem to be scribbling ‘Liverpool Forever — Come Rain or Mersey Mist.’
