Trent’s Mystical Comeback Timeline…
Picture this: Liverpool’s squad is like a flock of exhausted flamingos trying to tap dance! Bumbled by Fulham, the Reds are still waddling their way to the Premier League title, thanks to the wizardry of Arne Slot’s magical injury deflections. With that treatment table emptier than a stadium during lockdown (remember those times?), the squad somehow keeps kicking, flapping, and floundering along the pitch. Conor Bradley emerged like a cheesy plot twist, making Fulham wish they’d stuck to playing chess.
Meanwhile, Trent Alexander-Arnold’s hammy is throwing a tantrum bigger than a referee being given a red card! The number 66 might be reinventing himself as a bench tactician while waiting for a muscle-induced hibernation to end, with whispered dreams of Madrid in his sleep. While Trent tapes up his crystals to regenerate, Curtis Jones flipped his cape and became the unexpected superhero of right-backs — because who needs regular defenders?
Joe Gomez’s hamstring is wrapped in more mysteries than a haunted house, and Allison Becker’s noggin got a rattling that Brazil probably felt from space. But worry not, Red fans! With Arne Slot’s magical touch (seriously, does he have a wand?), this gaggle of limping footballers is inching its way back to the pitch, even if they occasionally play like penguins on roller skates. Fingers crossed for Alisson’s header clearance, eh?
