Mysterious Wirtz & the Bench Brigade…
In a twist of events more bewildering than trying to explain offside to a cat, Florian Wirtz is nowhere to be found at Liverpool’s pre-season kick-off against Preston North End. The $157 million man, fresh off the Leverkusen boat, has opted out of the squad. Rumors say he might be perfecting his Liverpudlian accent back at Kirkby with his buddies Van Dijk, Konate, and Mac Allister, or perhaps he’s off trying the famous local fish and chips. While these top guns enjoy personalized training, the rest of the squad is treatin’ it like a fancy after-school club.
Meanwhile, Giorgi Mamardashvili is making a grand entrance like a goalkeeper hopped up on energy drinks. He’s the only summer signing feeling the warm embrace of Deepdale’s football turf today. The rest of the rookie gang — Jeremie Frimpong, Milos Kerkez, Freddie Woodman, and Armin Pesci — are cozying up on the bench, possibly pondering if they’ve packed enough shin pads. Salah, the winger wizard, is cavorting on the field with Ryan Gravenberch and Dominik Szoboszlai, weaving through the midfield like a Friday night conga.
As the Liverpool bus purrs into Deepdale like a football chariot, young guns Rio Ngumoha and Trey Nyoni are unleashed into the field. With left-footed magic from Ngumoha and number 10 wizardry from Nyoni, the duo flanks amongst the veterans like peas in a very speedy pod. Meanwhile, Stefan Bajcetic is perfecting his couch potato routine, as Elliott and Morton enjoy a lazy vacay following their UEFA Under-21 triumph. All eyes are on the red jerseys; time to dance the Liver-bop!
