Pundits’ Peanut Gallery and the Yellow Card Conundrum…
Hold onto your shin pads, folks! James Tarkowski’s audacious tango with Alexis Mac Allister at the Merseyside derby had pundits scratching their heads harder than a manager running out of tactics during a cup final. Charging in like a rhino on roller skates, Tarkowski’s studs gave Mac Allister’s leg a love tap that looked more like a misguided attempt at modern art! Astonishingly, this heavy-metal collision was rewarded with just a measly yellow card by the ref – as if Tarkowski had merely forgotten to say ‘please’!
The always-eloquent Gary Neville likened it to a leg-breaker, while Jamie Carragher shook his head faster than a defender missing an open goal. Meanwhile, Everton’s iconic hard-man, Duncan ‘Big Dunc’ Ferguson, said it would have earned him a cozy red-card blanket back in the days of slide-tackling oafs. Let’s not forget, our man Carragher expected a straight red like expecting rain at a British barbecue. VAR, however, sat indifferent, sipping its tea in the corner, leaving everyone feeling like they’d missed the last train to Helsinki.
Even the beanstalk of neutrality trembled as the referee, perhaps jittery enough for a jitterbug, opted for caution instead of carnage. Poor Stephen Warnock could only watch in horror as Tarkowski’s interstellar tackles unfolded, calling it “out of control” with more urgency than a commentator describing a last-minute match-winner. Ah, sweet chaos of football… where every moment is unexpected, and every tackle could end in a very cartoonish reckoning!
