Isak’s Head Spins Like a Football in a Blender…
Magpies’ main man Alexander Isak has caught a shiny red lollipop dangling in Merseyside’s window and he can’t stop drooling! The Swedish sensation has been left at home while his Newcastle mates prance around Asia. Meanwhile, Liverpool has knocked on the Toon Town door, only to have it slammed shut with a “No candy for you” greeting, despite their puppy dog eyes.
Newcastle’s head coach, Eddie “The Howe-dini” Howe, swears on his magician’s hat that Isak’s love for his Geordie squad is like a Geordie Shore couple — full of passion and drama, but meant to last through the season! But secretly, he’s whispering to the garden gnomes that Chelsea, with pockets deeper than the Mariana Trench, is also eyeing his prized striker like a hungry seagull on chips at the seaside.
Isak’s contract is tighter than a pair of goalie’s gloves, but whispers of $200 million suggest temptation worth a pirate’s treasure. A possible mega sale could lead to a shopping spree wilder than a kid in a candy store, and that’s got everyone from the North East to the Kop buzzing with anticipation!
